Let me tell you all about my newest hobby. It's really quite thrilling. You see, I go into grocery stores to buy butter and frozen pizza and come out with puzzle books. I am a big fan, in particular, of word searches. I spend hours on end ignoring my husband while attempting to complete word searches in which I look for words like "liege" and "whiskers." Then I go to bed, not after 11 p.m. and not before complaining about how much my feet hurt and attempting to woo my cat into sleeping on the bed beside me.
It's weird when you reach this point that you realize why adults do things, and though you're conscious of this, you don't stop yourself from doing them too. Other things on this list that I've discovered include:
1. arguing about housework
2. getting a pet and treating it like it's a child
3. having less sex
4. having a drink immediately when you get home from work
5. feeling like you should go on a diet
6. placating yourself with stupid crap you don't need (like vintage luggage and xbox games)
I mean, many of these are the consequences of... responsibility. Responsibility of keeping a house, being a good partner, being successful at work and attempting to retain your sanity without absolute exhaustion. But it's hard keeping your edge, man, and with every Dell Official Word Search booklet I buy that advertises for porcelain Yorkies sitting in teacups wearing rhinestone collars, another piece of my youthful hipness dies.
Back to the puzzles. I just completed "Mustache Bash" and had the hardest fucking time trying to find "fu manchu."
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