die ticketmaster, die.

I ain't no hippie. I buy clothes that are most likely made in sweatshops. I enjoy Wendy's chicken nuggets and I've probably unwittingly contributed to the 401(k) of the CEO of R.J. Reynolds. But there are two companies that really infuriate me: Walmart and Ticketmaster.

Now, I know that Walmart basically has America by the balls. I know that there are hundreds, possibly thousands, of towns across America that base their entire economy on their local Walmart: where everyone works and everyone shops. And though I find their employment policies discriminatory and sexist (and I am rooting for the million-strong class action lawsuit against them), I recognize that, conscience be damned, sometimes you have to buy things cheaply and you have to buy them from Walmart.

But there is no excuse for the monopolistic shitpile that is Ticketmaster.

Yesterday, whilst showering, I was contemplated this devil of a corporation. Seth, Joel and I are planning on going to see Peaches (of F**k the Pain Away fame) in a week and a half. We went online on Tuesday to purchase the tickets from LiveNation - and found that two $18 tickets were going to cost us $54 - with a NINE DOLLAR convenience charge PER TICKET. You may not be aware, but Ticketmaster and LiveNation merged in February - creating the single-largest ticketing powerhouse in the world. Ticketmaster already controlled the sale of tickets for more than 80% of the venues in the U.S.

I still cannot understand how they have weaseled their way into this deal, effectively avoiding federal antitrust law. David Balto, on AmericanProgress.org, summed it up best, as follows. The beast that is Ticketmaster & LiveNation now:

• sells most of the concert tickets in this country through its contracts with venues
• manages a significant number of the marquee performers in the world or controls their tours
• owns most of the amphitheatres in the US and owns more 'club' venues, as well as controlling (through owning/leasing) a large amount of other clubs and theatres
• owns two of the major resellers of tickets
• owns various sources of competitively sensitive data

So basically, unless the only live music you're into is listening to that homeless guy play his 25-year-old broken Fender Strat in Davis Square on a Sunday afternoon, you're pretty much screwed. I still can't even fathom where Ticketmaster gets off charging YOU $2.50 to print a ticket ON YOUR OWN PRINTER, USING YOUR OWN INK. Not to mention the "facilities fee," which, I assumed, the club just made by overcharging you for booze. They now lump all the fees together into a simple "convenience charge," which they say is to pay for the convenience of finding tickets from your home computer, rather than standing in line at box offices, like they did in the days of yore. But here's the thing - running that online system doesn't cost Ticketbastard ANYTHING. It has boosted their profits tenfold to sell tickets online to anyone, anywhere. And now they've been caught with sending customers to TicketsNow, a so-called ticket "reseller," seconds after tickets are put up for sale on Ticketmaster, and charging huge markups. It seems like the rape will never end.

I won't be going to half as many shows as I used to. I guess it doesn't matter anyway, because the new House of Blues fucking sucks.